英语语法好的大牛帮我看看下面的作文中有什么语法错误帮我指出,狠批

Whenteenagersbecomeadolescents,theyhavetogotowork.Why?Atfirstglance,thereisnoreason,becauseeveryonehavetodothisinourtraditionalsense.However,thosewhodon’tunderstandwhatistruemeaningofonejobneverknowswhatistheessencesofbeautifullife.Inotherwords,onesuccessfuljobdoesnotmeanthemoneytheyhaveearned.Furthermore,thereisnocomparisonbetweenmoneyandhappinessatall.

Ajobisveryimportantforourhumanbeing.Theultimategoalaboutonejobisaself-fulfillingandresponsibilityforoursocietytoonepersonratherthanearnalotofmoney.Tobespecific,lawyer,teacher,ordoctor,nomatterwhichkindofcareer,theyactuallyhavecommonfeatures:theywantanotableposition;theywantgetmuchacceptancefromsociety.Beforetheygotonejob,youcanimagineonepersonspent10yearsevenlongerperiodoftimehadbeenstudiedinschoolanddidgreateffortsoncertainsubjects.Apparently,onejobdoesnotmeanmoneytheyhaveearned,weshouldrespectourmemorableyouthageduringourwonderfultime,thenajobbecomeabelieftocontinueourdreams.

Moreover,everyonelivingintherealworldneedajobtosustainlife,becauseadultshavetomakesurethattheycangiveasafetyenvironmentfortheiroldergeneration,becausethosewhoreallydogreateffortstoleadyoutotherightandbrightroad,youdefinitelyshouldprovideacomfortableenvironmentforthem,Ontheotherhand,youmustprovideabettereducationbackgroundforyourkids.Well,earnalotofmoneycouldsolvethisproblemsbecausemoneyisaformtoexchangeyoureffortsintoonethingthatcanstandforyourcontribution.

Inreality,wemayfacesuchproblems.Ifyougetonthetopofyourfieldandyouearnalotofmoney,youprobablysometimesconfrontsometroubles,suchasyouhavetodealwithsomepeoplewhohavetheperspectiveaboutlifetotallydifferentfromyours.Also,asacelebrity,youmayhavemuchpressurecomefromall-roundthancommonpeoplehave.

Inconclusion,onejobisveryimportantforhumanbeingforourlifewhetherintheaspectofself-fulfillingorinourdailylife.Ifwecouldbalancethejob,moneyanddifficultiesverywellinourlifetime,wemayhaveabetterandhappieraboutthefuture.